Malaysian actress Faezah Elai slams society’s negative perceptions of stepmothers

Faezah is a mother to five kids, including three stepchildren. — Picture from Instagram/faezahelai
Faezah is a mother to five kids, including three stepchildren. — Picture from Instagram/faezahelai

PETALING JAYA, Sept 22 — Malaysian actress Faezah Elai has penned an Instagram post calling out those who perpetuate negative stereotypes about stepmothers.

Faezah, who is a stepmother to three kids from her husband’s first marriage, said that stepmums deserve the same respect as biological mothers because they work hard to raise children that are not their own.

“Being a stepmum is not an easy job. (We are) misunderstood by society in a role that receives little recognition.

“If something goes wrong with your stepchildren, you are the one to blame,” said Faezah, 38.

She added that it was frustrating that some people still hold on to assumptions that all stepmothers are inherently “evil.”

“Society will say ‘They stay with their stepmum, that’s why they turned out like that. How can it be the same as staying with their biological mother, they must be stressed living with their stepmum.’

“But if (the children) succeed, all the credit will be given to the biological mother.

“What kind of mentality is this? We are not living in Cinderella and not all stepmums mistreat their stepchildren.”



Very long caption for Stepparents.. Being a stepmom is not an easy job.. Misunderstood by society,the roll receives little recognition.. If something goes wrong with ur stepchildren,u are the one to be blame.. Society will say “Dok ngan mak tiri,mcm tu lah.. mana sama mcm dok ngan mak sendiri..mesti stress ngan mak tiri la tu” But if they succeed,all the credit will be given to the biological mother.. Depa akan kata “Look!! Even though she’s a single mom but she managed to educate her children.. how impressive!! Strong women!!” Walau hakikatnya anak2 dok ngan mak tiri.. 🙄 What kinda mentality is this?? Ni bukan zaman cinderella mak tiri buat naya kt anak tiri.. Its 2020!! Lani anak2 tiri lg byk korey drp mak tiri,silap sikit viral.. . Dont get me wrong,i’m not talking about my life stories.. I’m blessed to have 3 stepchildren who are very understanding.. Yes.. indeed I have been taking care of my stepchildren since I got married.. I have a lot of respect for their mother's feelings and because of that I never shared any pounds about my stepchildren because I was worried that their mother would be upset with them.. . Stepmoms deserve the same respect a mother would receive,they pour all of their time,energy and love into a child that they didn’t even create.. . So to all moms,if ur children have a stepmom that cares for them,u are one lucky mother!! Free ur child from loyalty.. tell them its ok to love ur stepparent..bukan cucuk anak suruh benci tp hg tk bela anak hg,mak tiri yg bela.. . So STEPMOMS remember this, anyone can be a mom.. it takes a fearless warrior to be a STEPMOTHER!! . BEING A MOTHER DOESNT REQUIRE BLOOD.. IT REQUIRES BEING THERE FOR SOMEONE U LOVE.. . P/s : mak tiri,jaga lah anak2 tiri tanpa mengharapkan apa2 bila ampa dh tua.. buat lah dgn ikhlas sbb klu mengharap,nanti sendiri kiciwa.. . #stepmomlife #stepparentsmatter #iamawarrior #proundstepmom #feelingblessed #alhamdulillah #faezahelai #iamastepmom #lovelovelove #positivevibes

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The Rumah Siti Khadijah star said she was not basing her post on her personal experiences and that she was lucky to be blessed with stepchildren who are understanding.

However, she firmly believes that mothers and stepmothers should be held in the same regard for their maternal duties.

She also urged mothers to give their children the freedom to love both their biological parents and stepparents instead of making it a competition.

“Stepmums deserve the same respect a mother would receive. They pour all of their time, energy, and love into a child that they didn’t even create.

“To all mums, if your children have a stepmum that cares for them, you are one lucky mother!

“Free your child from loyalty and tell them it’s okay to love their stepparent.

“It takes a fearless warrior to be a stepmother. Being a mother doesn’t require blood, it requires being there for someone you love.”

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