Growing up — Syamim Hariri

AUG 27 — During my primary and secondary years, I was fortunate enough to have had a few good friends who were very close with me.

Now these were good friends, but the icing on the cake was that I had also had a few best friends and not just one as many others have. To be exact, I had two Malays, one Chinese and also one Indian as my best friends.

For the record, my close friends were made up entirely of Chinese and Indians.

The main language to communicate with my non-Malay friends have always been English and this included during primary, secondary, college and right up till now. Seldom did I use Malay to communicate with them. I only used Malay with my Malay friends. I was in fact more comfortable with English and this might be due to the fact that I had spent a portion of my childhood abroad.

I consider myself blessed in so many ways. Not only did I have a happy upbringing and a great family, outside of the home I had had so many friends who I can confide in. I grew up with no major problems and I had the best of time.

Around 2013, one of my friend, who was an Indian, had called up asking to catch up. We decided on a place and I asked him to bring along another friend who was a Chinese. We later met at the place and had our dinner together. There were some light talk during dinner with the usual catching up and how’s it going as old friends do when they meet.

After finishing our sumptuous dinner of roti canai garing and fish curry, my Chinese friend had cracked a joke saying what else do the Chinese want? This was in clear reference to a question posed by our Prime Minister after the general election where it seemed like all the Chinese had abandoned him and his cause siding with the opposition. All of us at the table had laughed as that was really a stupid statement or question.

Then the conversation had taken a serious turn as my Indian friend after he stopped laughing asked me, how I viewed the non-Malays. He said that he could feel the earth rumbling beneath him and that there were some tensions amongst the races and he could not sensed this during the time we grew up.

My Chinese friend, who lauds himself and is so proud of the fact that he could speak perfect Malay mentions that, all jokes aside, he feels that the Malays, compared to when we were growing up and now, were less friendly and sometimes eyed him with suspicion.

I chimed in and mentioned that these two guys who were at the table with me were whom I viewed as brothers. I further added that despite what is being said by the politicians, papers that were mouthpiece for political parties and any individuals did not in any way reflect my views and how I view the non-Malays.

I further on mentioned that the Malays who had beef with the non-Malays hadn’t grown up and had the privilege of knowing whom I had known. It goes without saying that the non-Malays who had had beef with the Malays, hadn’t grown up in my friends’ shoes and known the great guy that is me.

And why is there beef all around us? It is because we failed to assimilate. Everything is based on race. Everything in this country is based on race and it is ripping the thread and seams that are holding this nation together.

In hindsight, I feel that I was fortunate that my non-Malay friends had chosen to go to a Sekolah Kebangsaan and a Sekolah Menengah Kebangsaan. If they had chosen to go elsewhere, I wouldn’t have met them and I wouldn’t be the guy that I am today.

I do not want to delve into the types of school in Malaysia. There are so many reasons why parents enroll their child into any one type of school and write up is not about addressing those.

However I would like to suggest that we allow our schools to become like our colleges and universities. Where there would be a home class at the very beginning and then students are free to roam. I sincerely wish that more would get my opportunity at witnessed the things I saw and have camaraderie like I had climate would not allow that.

It makes me feel even luckier that I managed to get what I got as I truly believe that only a select few are lucky enough to get what I got.

The situation is where children are separated and groomed without knowing one another. How do we expect to prosper as a nation when majority that are brought up in the system grow up without knowing one another. It is like a factory that is producing one product but the designing team is not on talking terms with the components team.

Empathy is best developed during childhood. Malaysia has the entire ingredient to produce world talent but something is holding us back. Knowledge isn’t learnt only in school. “Soft knowledge” is something that should be apparent in our people but we have failed.

Depending on which race you ask, you will get differing answers and views. So which is right? It doesn’t matter. What matters is the future and we know the problem so how should we move about for the future? I think the time is nigh that the different races of Malaysia buck up and come together as one.

Forget the misunderstandings, forget what this race has got and what that race has not and close ranks. We can be different but we need to understand each other better and definitely close ranks. Because at the end of the day, if things stay status quo, this nation that we all call home, despite some of our grandparents arriving on boats, tongkangs or whatnots, will falter.

If it falters, where are we to go?

* This is the personal opinion of the writer or publication and does not necessarily represent the views of Malay Mail Online.