OCT 14 — I don't understand the outrage over the comments on the Petronas children photo. Because it's something so common, I've come to expect it.
It's not just men who shame and leer at women online. There are plenty of women who enable this virtual catcalling, and because of the anonymity the Internet affords, the comments online are far more vicious than what you'd get in real-life.
The closest I'd come to this sort of thing offline is when I was waiting for a bus in a remote area of Bangi. It was fasting month; I was wearing a long, ankle-length dress, cotton, with flowers. Scoop-neck, but no cleavage. No slits, short sleeves.
I thought I looked fairly presentable, and decent.
It wasn't enough for two locals who stopped their motorcycle just to berate me for "not respecting the fasting month." Just because I wasn't covered up in more acceptable attire (read: baju kurung).
I wasn't sure whether to be amused or flattered that such simple attire would get them so tittilated. Though I sometimes wish the younger me had been angrier and carried an umbrella, to hit them with until they learned to mind their own business.
My favourite dress to wear during fasting month these days is short, tight and is covered with crucifixes. If that doesn't scare away people like the ones I met in Bangi, I don't know what will.
Still, I don't see young Muslim women being berated by total strangers in malls to pakai lebih sopan (dress more decently) or tutup aurat (cover their aurat). Yet so many people think it's acceptable to do that online.
It's hellish being a woman celebrity in Malaysia, judging from Instagram comments. You can't be a singer or actress without having total strangers make ludicrous comments on your Instagram, Twitter or Facebook.
For these starlets, if they're not wearing hijab, they'd be hounded into wearing one. If they start wearing hijab, they get hounded if the hijab is worn in a style these so-called fans consider unsuitable. Or like poor Neelofa, get accused of wearing hijab just to promote their own hijab line.
You can never win with these Internet commenters.
In a perfect world, any idiot who says hateful things online would be struck by thunderbolts or zapped by their keyboards.
Right now, though, we have to understand that in situations where people feel they can be callous idiots with no repercussions, believe me, they will take advantage of that.
One word of advice to anyone facing the problem of horrible comments: remember that no one has the right to be directly hateful to you on social media or off it. If they want to criticise you, sure, but they have no real right to use your social media accounts to do so. Let them Tweet on their own channels or pages; save your comments for people who can express themselves without sounding like horny old lechers.
If you wouldn't let a total stranger walk up to you in public or into your house just to make lewd comments about your chest, then why tolerate it on social media? Zero tolerance is really the only way to go here.Delete, ban, report all you like.
Internet trolls deserve nothing at all, so when you deal with your own, starve them of the one thing they really crave: attention. You've got better things to do than waste time on people who obviously have sadder lives than yours.
* This is the personal opinion of the columnist.
