KUALA LUMPUR, April 24 – Malaysians have been ordered to stay home for another two weeks to help the country make it through the Covid-19 pandemic.
But what may be more worrying to many couples is how their relationships are meant to survive this unprecedented period of stress and isolation.
Looking at initial global reports, consultant urologist Professor Dr George Lee Eng Geap said the world has seen an increase in usage of condoms and morning-after contraception.
“Such statistics may reflect an early increase in sexual behaviour changes as couples seem to be turning to sex for comfort or as a temporary distraction,” he said.
While more sexual activities may mean extra pleasure to some, Dr Lee said the sudden change in lifestyle with enforced proximity and without other social interaction can induce immense tension in any relationship.
“In fact, experts predict the MCO may either ‘make or break’ relationships, if household strains are not handled properly.”
Dr Lee said apart from striking the perfect work-life balance at home, couples were now forced to spend more time with each other.
“The inability to see other friends and relatives for the relief of tension may also render couples feelings towards each other.
“On top of that, the worry about job security and uncertainty of financial status may cause anxiety and lead to frictions within households.”
What are the signs that your relationship is falling?
Dr Lee said relationship strain affects daily life and sexual desire in both men and women.
“When an individual is faced with stress and anxiety, the sympathetic system will induce increased shots of energy to deal with the challenges.
“When the sympathetic system is on overdrive, the individuals become agitated and short-tempered,” he added.
If the situation persists, Dr Lee said it may manifest itself with symptoms of depression such as insomnia, fatigue, lack of appetite and low sexual desire.
“It is also common for men to experience erectile dysfunction and intimacy avoidance.
“Eventually, the prolonged impact of stress hormone may result in aggression followed by guilt towards partners, which can often induce immense challenges in relationships,” he said.
How to keep it alive?
In order to keep the relationship and desire alive during the MCO, Dr Lee said individuals need to reflect on oneself first.
“It is important to self-evaluate the emotions and feelings during the isolation.
“Sometimes it helps by writing down the concerns and anxiety,” he said.
Dr Lee noted that it is unreasonable to expect the partner to be the sole source of stress relief.
“Two useful ways to overcome the strains are meditation and exercise.
“Meditation will help you to focus on the important issues, while exercise will generate endorphin to handle stress, improving mood and boosting immunity.”
After self-evaluation, Dr Lee advised couples to have open communications, giving each other support throughout MCO period.
“Simple gestures like cuddles, kisses and hugs can help the body to relax and relieve stress.
“Additionally, bedroom actions such as massage, role-play and date nights are also good distractions and may help induce comfort in each other,” he added.
For couples separated due to movement restrictions and travel bans, Dr Lee advised them to be creative and utilise the technology to check in with each other daily.
“This includes texting, emailing, connecting with each other via social media and Zoom.
“Be intentional creative about time spent ‘together’, this can include watching online entertainment, cooking or eating together.”
Dr Lee said it would be useful to dig out old memorabilia for reminiscing of time together.
Apart from that, he said when it comes to bedroom actions, being creative with watching adult material online together can help keep the “magic” when living apart.
