MAY 20 — Have you had a moment when you asked someone a question only to receive an answer that doesn’t answer anything? Of course you have. So have I. Regularly. And it’s upsetting.
To be fair, sometimes we have good reasons to give these non-answers (though whether this is ultimately right or wrong is a different question). If someone puts you in the spotlight about a difficult issue, blabbering makes you sound like an ignorant idiot.
So you sidestep the question. You might flip the question and ask the other person what he or she thinks. You might slowly give bits and pieces of what you think to gauge how informed the other person is relative to you so you can decide what to do next. Or you might avoid answering altogether and ask for more time.
But sometimes you can’t do this. Someone asks you an important question that requires an immediate answer. And you have that nagging feeling that person knows you can answer. And you know that person will be upset if you don’t.
But at the same time you’re not quite sure how to frame your answer in a way that fully answers the question. So how?
Don’t worry. I submit below four easy steps you can take to attack a difficult question and find an appropriate response. Direct answers to direct questions save you time from having to do time-consuming replies such as long letters or FAQs.
Step 1 — Understand what the question is about
The first step to answering a question is to understand what is being asked. What is the subject? This could be the weather, recent news reports, your kids, and so on.
Now this is a basic but crucial stage. Talking about submarines when the other person was asking you about your fashion choices? That could be awkward. So it helps to ensure your brain remains at optimal performance levels whenever you are at risk of facing unsolicited questions.
Here’s a hypothetical scenario that you should avoid here:
Asker: Hey, where did you buy that tasty-looking nasi lemak?
Wrong answer: It’s not fair for you to presume I am ditching my diet plan with this nasi lemak.
Step 2 — Recognise what the asker wants to know
Now that you know the subject in the above question is the nasi lemak you’re holding, the next step is to identify what the other person wants to know. This is normally an instantaneous process done by our brain.
For some people, however, it may be easy to get confused. Just remember to focus on the what, where and so on. The question above had two key words – “where” and “buy” – and one subject, which is nasi lemak. Get it? Of course you do.
Here’s a hypothetical scenario that you should avoid here:
Asker: Hey, where did you buy that tasty-looking nasi lemak?
Wrong answer: Oh, this nasi lemak? It’s delicious and has chicken, anchovies and cucumber. Good sambal.
Step 3 — Identify relevant facts
You know what the question is about and you know what the asker wants to know. Now you should be able to pick out information in your brain that is directly relevant to the question.
In the question above, we have established that the asker wants to know where you bought the nasi lemak. The relevant fact would be the location at which you removed some currency out of your pocket and handed them over to a vendor who subsequently provided you with a packet of food commonly known as nasi lemak.
Any other fact, while relevant, may not necessarily be what your asker wants to know. So put priority to the most relevant fact. This must be the lead component of your reply.
Here’s a hypothetical scenario that you should avoid here:
Asker: Hey, where did you buy that tasty-looking nasi lemak?
Wrong answer: Oh, I bought this nasi lemak for RM4.20 this morning.
Step 4 — Organise your answer and say it
Okay, so you have precisely the relevant nugget of information that the asker wants to know. But presentation matters. Otherwise the other person would be left confused.
What you can do here is to tap into the years of language training we have had in school and remember the standard procedures of constructing sentences. Subject, verb, noun and all that.
Here’s a hypothetical scenario that you should avoid here:
Asker: Hey, where did you buy that tasty-looking nasi lemak?
Wrong answer: Petaling Jaya. Office. Roadside. Woman. Jalan Templer.
Now that we have these four steps, it’s time to put them into practice. Let’s revisit that hypothetical question again.
Asker: Hey, where did you buy that tasty-looking nasi lemak?
Perfect answer: Dear chap, I bought this delightful pack of nasi lemak at a roadside stall along Jalan Templer, Petaling Jaya when I was on my way to the office this morning.
Happy answering!
* This is the personal opinion of the columnist.
