OCT 8 — On 9 May, 2018 after GE14 I slept with my conscience well at peace with myself that I had done a prodigious deed in a small way. My vote made a difference, I chose to think. I cried alongside the leaders who waged the war of the century to save Malaysia from drowning. I was proud to have been a part of the making of Malaysia Baru.

About a month ago, one evening on my return from college, I saw my 63-year old father completely sunk in his own thoughts and his forced smile didn’t conjure happiness; it was sinister, hollow and senseless. I sat next to him and I could see his veins pumping on his neck and forehead and he suddenly seemed to have aged.

His melancholic state terrified me and on probing he said he may not have a job any more. My father supplied hardware to a contractor who was involved in a big project and he is the sole bread-winner in my family.

My family is waiting to see me through college so that I could carry on the legacy of caring for my family.

I still remember the proud moment two years ago when my father came back with announcement of his biggest achievement at having won the contract for a small portion of pipe laying works for a big job.

I have vivid recollection of the day when the Government of the day made the first cancellation. We huddled together and I told my father Malaysia Baru knows what it is doing. We lived in hope of seeing better days ahead of us.

He knew better and shook his head vehemently, pain sparked in his eyes, perhaps predicting full well things will never be the same. I have since taken on a part-time job while my father is still waiting hoping

I might have been right.

Today, seeing the headlines of the newspapers, I learn that another job has been taken away and my heart is weak with fear and worry, a grim reminder marring my day. Questions are ringing in my head on how many families like mine will now lose their earnings, I felt drained.

Every time a job gets cancelled or postponed, the effect is far reaching and goes beyond what the Government cares to know. The saying "short term pain for long term gains” does not fit into context here when decisions are made in haste and at the whims.

For the first time since the election I am questioning the wisdom of Malaysia Baru if they truly have the welfare of the Rakyat at heart. The Council of Eminent Persons and the team of Ministers are there because we the Rakyat wanted better days ahead of us.

Each passing day, I am being reminded that politicians will always be politicians. Is there some ulterior motive to punish the big boys which is leaving the smaller ones in poverty? Why do I see triumphant smirk stretched across the face of power and authority? Does Malaysia Baru care for us or are they another set of vultures not after money but perhaps revenge?

All I see now is a whole lot of disorientation on the ground. Small and big business are reeling from lack of opportunities. People are out of jobs. All we hear daily is that the Government does not have enough money and that is being trumpeted widely- is it to seek sympathy?

I am a student and in a year’s time I will be out in the job market and I don’t know what Malaysia holds for me anymore. I now don’t see even a flicker of hope, only the horror of a dark morrow stands mocking at me.

*This is the personal opinion of the writer or publication and does not necessarily represent the views of Malay Mail.