JANUARY 18 — Sleep was far from me that night as I sat on the sofa in front of the TV; it was already past midnight, and tears streamed down my face. Shock had turned to complete and utter sadness for what had just happened in my country.  

I have never cried over an election, not in my country of birth nor the countries where I have lived. Presidents come and go, their policies and their influence, some good, some bad, but ultimately life goes on and our country still functions as it should.

But this election felt personal. It felt like lines had been drawn in the sand, lines of divisiveness and bitterness. Perhaps there was a lot to be critical of President Obama and his policies, indeed I often was, but his character was never in question to me. People were often critical about things that were, in my opinion, silly, but I felt proud that he was my president as I travelled the world.  

I could disagree with him, and still be proud of him.  

But Mr Trump I could not and cannot, and my disbelief and shock that he will soon be the President of the United States of America has not gone away. What Donald Trump represented during the campaign were not things that are easy to simply let go as differences, they were personal to large portions of our population. 

He made statements and showed characteristics which many of us believe must be rejected outright; they seemed to be morally destitute in many regards. These could not be just shrugged off as political differences.   

Many people in the US are fearful of what will happen as he takes office. Things he said may not ultimately come to pass, but the fact that they were said and supported by a large segment of society, enough to get him elected, means that many in our nation are afraid today, not just of our president but also of society in general.

Children whose first language is English but who speak to their parents in Spanish.  Men, women and children who have been in this country for generations but who pray towards Mecca.  Men and women who fly a rainbow flag from their homes.  African American mothers waiting for their sons to get home every night.  Women who have been assaulted and who see their attacker in every man who uses manipulation and deceit in their interactions with women. The young woman born with Down's Syndrome sweeping floors at Starbucks greeting every customer with a huge smile and a hug.

These people, and the people who love them, have fear, sadness and a lot of unknowns. Not just about what may happen in our country through legal means, but also fear that 60 million people who supported Donald Trump believe these things and may hurt them or discriminate against them or hate them.  It's a heavy thing for many of our population to carry.  It's difficult to look at every person and wonder if that person hates them because of their religion, or sexual preference or race.  It's painful. It's scary.

At the beginning of December, I left the US and returned to East Africa.  A land which has known its fair share of tyrants, dictators and egotistical and morally bankrupt leaders.  Even here, where people are used to such bullying tactics as we have seen from the president elect, people are in shock.  It is more than just shock over our president, but a sadness that the America they had always thought they knew doesn’t exist.  

To be fair many who have not lived in the US have an overinflated, Hollywood-esque, view of all things American.  A view which is often not touched in reality.  But in this election people saw a glimpse of reality in the US and it disturbed them.  Old men and women in the farthest reaches of this land, deep in the villages, feel disappointment in the disappearance of their American dream.  

The uncertainty that exists within the US and indeed throughout the world is nearly palpable. Fear continues to be close to many. Whether or not you believe it is legitimate that people feel the fear and uncertainty is not the point, the point is people feel it, with cause, and there lies in the responsibility of every American, I would specifically say to every American who voted for Mr Trump, to do everything possible to allay these fears.  

As President Obama bids farewell, and I watch him go with not a little sadness, anxiety is rolling in my stomach at the prospect of Mr Trump putting his hand on the Bible and swearing to fulfill the office of President of the United States to the best of his abilities and for the best of all of America.  The man who campaigned could not possibly do that, for his was a campaign of selfishness, bullying and "I” versus "we.” 

So I, like the world, wait.  And though selfishly I would love to be able to say "I told you so” in a few years, my greatest hope for my country is that somehow this man fulfils every bit of the oath he will take to "faithfully execute the office of the President of the United  States and will, to the best of his ability, preserve, protect and defend the constitution,” and may it be said with a "so help me God,” because without such I do not think we have much hope.   

* This is the personal opinion of the columnist.