PETALING JAYA, March 28 — Parents and teachers should join forces to tackle problems faced by children before they turn serious. 

National Parent-Teacher Association chairman Prof Datuk Mohamad Ali Hasan said teachers should enrol in early childhood behaviour courses.

“This course will help them notice signs of students going through stress or family issues and figure out what should be done before the situation gets out of hand,” he said.

He said parents should also be involved in basic parenting duties to bond with their children.

“They should take note of how their child act at home and notice  differences. Ask if anything is bothering them in a soft manner as parents should be friends with their children and not someone the children should be afraid of,” he said.

Mohamad Ali said the Education Ministry should take immediate action against bullies in the tongue-snipping case and not wait for the report from the school.

“This will take time and by the time the investigation starts, the suspects are nowhere to be found,” he said.

He said the investigation should also cover the parents of both the victim and the bullies and their teachers.

“What were the teachers doing when the boy complained? Did they not take it seriously? What about the parents? Did they not look into their children’s behaviour or see any changes? This is something serious and all parties should be investigated to get to the root of the problem,” he said.

He hoped it would be the “first and last brutal bully case”.

Parent Action Group for Education chairman Datin Noor Azimah Abdul Rahim said parents and teachers needed to frequently liaise with each other regarding the progress and behaviour of the children.

“Parents should not solely depend on teachers to discipline their kids. Instead, they should work together with the teachers,” she said. 

She said parents should seek a monthly update from the teachers about their children’s difficulties at school and any strange behaviour.

“One of the key factors to avoid bullying issues is to observe the behavioural changes in a child,” she said. 

Azimah said parents should teach their children to stand up for themselves against bullies and to seek for help from teachers if matters worsen.

“Children should be taught to not provoke the bullies using violence, but instead boldly speak up to defend themselves,” she said. 

Parents commenting on the case of the schoolboy from Klang who was forced by bullies to cut off the tip of his tongue believe violent tendencies come from a combination of an unstable home environment and exposure to the rampant portrayal of violence on media.

Self-employed single mother Nor Sarah Reza, 26, said children imitated the actions of their parents.

She has noticed her son has a tendency to repeat phrases she used to discipline him.

“Parents do not necessarily have to be violent towards the child for them to pick up violent habits. The children just observe the way their parents or older siblings interact with each other,” she said.

She said parents may not realise it, but television shows played a major role in influencing a child’s behaviour.

“Sometimes, when I watch cartoons with my son, I notice shows aimed for young children are full of violent scenes and adult jokes,” she said.

“Children think it is alright to copy this bad behaviour.”

She also questioned why the school took so long to get in touch with the child’s parents.

“When it takes three hours to call a parent on something this serious, you have to wonder if this school is the best place for your son,” she said.

Leasing executive Sharon Ann Liew, 36, said her children sometimes surprised her with things they said or did.

“They learn from our actions without us realising and it is important to set good examples especially if you are not the type who takes the time to sit down with them and teach them,” she said.

The mother of two said parents hoped teachers would ensure the safety of their children in school.

“Teachers may say their role is only to teach, not to babysit, but it is still their job to educate them on the importance of behaving properly,” she said.

Legal associate Yap Khan Kee, 30, said the punishment for the bullies should be something they could learn from.

She said it was difficult to pin the blame on only one party as both the teachers and the bullies were responsible for the situation.

However, retiree Hema Ayavoo, 56, felt bullies should undergo counselling instead of punishment to understand why they were lashing out this way.

“Things like these happen because there is pain in them which makes them want to hurt others,” she said, adding that children did not know the consequences of these actions. 

She agreed schools should be held responsible and teachers needed to be more caring and look out for such things.